The calling is great, the position high, the placement significant and the acceptance difficult. The reality of it all is incredibly uncomfortable. How in God’s name do we rise up to occupy our position? How do we propel ourself to our rightful place? How do we surge forward and upward? Where are our stepping stones? It’s time to climb up, but have we got the strength in our hands legs and core? Do we have the words in our mouth? The baby arrived before we felt ready, but are we ever going to feel ready or do we just grow into the role? The gift is great, magnificent and beautiful, but we feel unworthy and out of sort. We are agitated and conflicted, we struggle for we have never been here before. This is growth like we have never known. The accident propelled us to greatness, the chaos birthed destiny, yet destiny felt alien. Though we are eagles, flying feels alien when we have been told all our lives we are to move and cluck around like chickens. We balk at our destiny, we are unsettled and destabilized.
The royal regalia never feels right at the first fitting, the wearer must grow into it. We feel like we have committed an offense we don’t know how to repent of, the offence of soaring, of aspiring, of becoming. Our true identity has never been unveiled, our true power never revealed, a glimpse of who we are is scary. Accepting our magnificence is an act to be mastered. I am all that is revealed and more and the gift is all I am and more. I am as beautiful, as strong, as magnificent and as large as the gift and more, I am the gift to myself and to the world. Me without any air or need to succumb to the subtle or not so subtle duress to be less. No need to puff or shrink, I must occupy my scared position. I must quietly grow as I accept the gift. It is just right, a token of who I am, a remembrance!
Beautiful Ivory 