Pour Some More

I sat there and lifted up my glass, ‘pour some more’ I muttered with a deep and heavy heart as realisation slowly but surely hit me. They poured it to the rim and it ran over, my glass was as light as it always was and always will be, air has no weight! Slowly I sipped my air, pausing to consider all I gave up to be partaker of the light headedness that consumed my whole body at the first taste of air. How intoxicating it was, nothing can be compared to that lift and float that encapsulate the heaviness that otherwise was my existence. “I always knew I was destined to fly” I muttered in my stupor until realisation hit me and I stumped to the ground. Maybe human were never destined to fly, to soar and experience the liberty that the soul so desires, to see, to have that helicopter view, we are grounded, earth bound creature, to seek anything outside of this could possibly be an illusion, a delusion. I took another sip from my glass as I continue to contemplate.

I have cut off my anchors and destroyed my habitat as I believe in the dream of flying. Now that I have experienced the illusion of flying I can never be content with being hurdle up like chickens and picking scrapes of food from the ground, eagle I am I thought, but am I really an eagle or am I just a chicken that grew too big for its boot? I feel like I have lost it all as I took another sip from my glass of air. It no longer intoxicates and I am no longer lifted, yet I can no longer stay happily on the ground.

We believe a dream, an illusion, it was so sweet, so fulfilling yet unreal. Reality is unbearable, such a drudgery, a weight on the soul! The soul yearns to be free. It gains the freedom and lost all, the structure it knew, the stability, the acceptance of society, the routine, the game, the ritual, you lose it all and for what? Freedom! Is it even worth the paper it is written on? I guess only time will tell. The structure and the gift is gone, The suspicious love and acceptance is gone, Air intoxicant no longer intoxicates, lt was never true, never existed but yet so strong so intense, so real, how can the fake be so impactful?

All I can do is pray, that one day I will be delivered from the obsession with air. One day I will be delivered from all that hurts, one day I will truly be free, one day I will no longer want to drink air, but we will always need air, we must breath!