…. I looked back and could not believe what I saw. If I didn’t know any better I would say I did not leave the trail, that it wasn’t me, I know not the person, but I do know the person, I know her very well and it is no other than moi. But do I really know the person? How could I be so stupid? How could I make such a mess? I was deep in the throes of madness and I have all the evidence to prove it. The trail is still intact. I am deeply embarrassed and I want more than anything to remove every trail of my foolishness, every reminder that I was once an idiot. I don’t want to associate or have anything to do with someone that behaved in such manner. The memory must be erased, the file deleted, the photo removed. No, I don’t want to see it, I don’t want to know, I don’t need the trail, I don’t need a remembrance of how it all started.
But I did it, in my innocence I did it, I went mad and left a trail! It is a reminder that man is just but man, a vulnerable being capable of great feats and also moments of deep embarrassment.
I decided to leave my trail, not to deride me, but to remind me that I am just human, I am not the custodian of all wisdom neither am I the all perfect being, I am capable of a fall, a big fall for that matter, I am capable of making am almighty mess, of losing the plot, of going off on a tangent. And maybe every time I see my trail, it reminds me not to get big headed, to be humble, to take heed least I find myself in the same throes of madness again. It reminds me to take my ‘medications’, whatever they might be. There is nothing that brings perspective like being able to look back at our moment of insanity from a sanity view point.
We must keep a museum of our madness sometimes to remind us where not to go, what not to do and who not to partner with.
Let he that stands, take heed, least he falls.
Beautiful Ivory 