The Past Is Intact!

… nothing prepared me for the pain I felt, the sense of emptiness and disconnect, of floating aimlessly and without purpose. It felt like every building block of my life was gone, every stepping stone had been remove and I was falling into a non ending bottomless pit. I felt like every cell in my body had been remove, I was nobody, what gave me a sense of who I was had been remove and disposed of. I reached out to touch and there was nothing, just nothing, emptiness at it’s uttermost, my heart sank, how I longed to build it all back, to string it all together, to put them all where they belong, but there was none to be found. The house has been emptied and locked, it is now a ghost house! Ah! That is harsh! crushing in every manner imaginable.

Mummy is gone, Anti Bisi is gone, Anti Yemisi is gone, Anti Foluke is gone, Daddy is gone, Sunday is no where to be found, those that brought me into the world are gone, those above me are gone. Who am I? Where do I belong? I am now an Orphan and I feel every bit like one. Confuse and deflated, I felt like I was just a carcass as all that fed me and fed into me was no more.

My past! My past! My past!!!! I cried and shouted ‘the house is empty!’ Where do I go to review and connect? “You need go no where, for right here with you I am”. Replied my past. The past is intact, non of it is lost, not a single one, every building block is exactly where they were, every cell is still doing what it should do, every supply is still where it was. The past is untouched, the memory is the screen, the door to see all that needs to be seen, to stay connected. It is all there, none of it is lost, the stepping stones are all there. Yes there is no physical place to go to and call home, but true home is in the heart. It’s all here.

Treasure the memories and create new ones. Life is for living!